“It’s better you put your kids in a toilet instead of putting them in a public school. At least if you put them in a toilet you can wash them after”
Sheikh Yusuf Estes
There is going to come a point in your life insha’Allah when your kids will start school and you have to decide what to do. Should you put them in public school, private (i.e. Islamic) school, or homeschool?
This article will not discuss homeschooling as an option, but will discuss the Islamic school option. As soon as you decide to put your kids in Islamic school you will find that most of the society will be against you. First of all, funding for Islamic schools is usually private, they are not usually funded by the public sphere (i.e. government funding) unlike public schools. This puts the onus on the Muslim community to cover all the expenses for running the school. To give you an example, at the time this article was written, ISNA Elementary School costs approximately $4000 a year for your young son or daughter. That is approximately the cost of 1 term of university education!
Now, the second common argument against Islamic schools is that the quality of education is poor. Dunya comes first, and akhirah is secondary, so put them with the public schools.
Here are some points to consider. First of all is that it is well known among the elite of society that school is a form of public indoctrination. What that means is schools are used to pass on the values of a culture onto the masses. Those in control who are the mala of society are the ones who control what goes into the curriculum and what is published in the books. For some more details on this topic, I recommend reading “The lies my teacher told me” (source needed). If you put your kids into this school, you are sending them to be indoctrinated with the common views and beliefs of a society.
Kids are young and impressionable, do you really want some homosexual, some liberal, some feminist, or some overall radicalist implanting these values into your son at a young age? Do you really want to start planting the seeds of discord in your family at this date and time?
As well, from parents whose kids are in school, it has been noted that kids tend to listen to their teacher before their parent. Hamza Yusuf once gave the example of how his child was being taught Quran by a teacher who was from an Indian background and mispronounced some of the letters, but when he tried to correct his child, they responded saying the teacher knows better!
Next, there is no public implementation of Aqamas Salah, Prayers in Congregation. If your kids are lucky, they might get a chance to pray, if not, well they will grow up thinking its normal not to pray during the day. Don’t forget jumuah prayers, you either will have to drag them out of school for that, otherwise they will have to implement it at school, which can be difficult to say the least.
Also, Christmas is very much promoted, not to mention other festivals of shirk like Halloween, Easter, Valentines, and so on. Do you want your kids feeling joy that it’s Christmas and wanting to put up a Christmas tree like everyone else? Well that is what will happen. On the other side, Ramadan and Eid will be promoted in an Islamic school.
Regarding the mixing issue, there will be no school dances, mixing is not encouraged by the administration and thus boyfriend/girlfriend issues will be less common. It will definately occur, but it won’t be flaunted like in a public school. When you are a young child in high school and you see all these guys kissing girls, don’t tell me that you don’t desire the same for yourself. Admit it, your kids will be tempted…..
Here is something else to consider. Muhammad Alshareef once mentioned that if there is an Islamic school started in an area with the intention of protecting our kids, and wealthy people live in the area, but they do not put their kids in that school NOR do they support it, and the school fails (goes out of business, closes down), they will all be responsible for the failure of that school. The administration and those who struggled to make it work will inshaAllah not be responsible but the community overall will be. What this means is establishing an Islamic school is fard kifayah.
Oh Muslims how do you expect us to establish great organizations of education for our children? We want these Islamic schools to be superior in education and better than the secular schools. We want our children to grow up with a strong understanding in life and deen so that when someone tells them that a monkey is where they came from, they will have confidently be able to discuss and disprove such false allegations.
We ask Allah to grant us the rizq and the ability to establish centers of education not just for preschool, but also elementary schools, high schools, and inshaAllah even universities.
Update March 24, 2009
Today my 4 (almost 5) year old taught me a dua to say before eating: “Allahuma Bariklana …..”
Mashallah,
More information:
- Islamic Schools – Who’s Responsible CD (Muhammad Alshareef, EmanRush Publishers)
#1 by Suffiya on March 16, 2009 - 2:17 pm
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Asalamualikum Brother,
First of all, this is an excellent article, May Allahu Taala (SWT) reward you.
But the problem remains that Islamic schools in this country are not only underfunded, but also understaffed and sometimes quite less than professional. How can we solve this? Is it just funding or do people consider Islamic-oriented education as second best?
People don’t want to put their kids in Catholic/or other religious schools and they end up going to Public school.
That is the fact of the matter and that is why 99% of Muslim kids are going to public school.
Can you comment on that, pls.
#2 by Uzair Khan on March 16, 2009 - 2:33 pm
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As salamu alaikum Abdullah,
Jazakallah Khair for the excellent article.
I agree wth this problem and it is a sad one. As the sister stated above, we are lacking in qualified people to teach or run islamic schools.
I believe that its not the funding that is lacking, but the fact that people do in fact consider islamic education as second best, which is very sad unfortunately.
My daughter is currently 15 months and I constantly worry and wonder what to do when she becomes ready to go to school. I definately do not want her to go to public school, as I myself went to public school since kindergarten and I know hard it can be for someone to constantly battle with the requirements of their religion vs. what they are taught in school.
I believe we need to put more emphasis on people to become teachers to specifically teach in Islamic schools.
We should also form some sort of organization for concerned parents who want to help on this issue to encourage awareness and the need for Islamic Schools especially in Toronto.
If anyone is interested, please email me at uzairkhan@gmail.com and we can start planning such an initiative.
Jazakallah Khair,
As salamu alaikum,
Uzair Khan
#3 by Murad on March 16, 2009 - 2:45 pm
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Assalamualikum,
I believe education is so important. The only way to prove to my future children (inshaAllah) is by showing my passion proactively. This is the best way to help your kids to progress far in life.
From my study of people and families I would say children are an imitation of their parents, they adopt some or many core characteristic, the extent of executing these personality may differ.
While on my trips I heard this beautiful story which made me really think. Although Im not so great at narrating stories or writing I’ll my lazy best.
“A couple were living together an almost happy life. However the poor wife had to always bare the burden of looking after her husbands father. Being a frustrated wife she ordered her husband what will you do with this grumpy man, get rid of him. He resisted even though his relationship with his father was on a no talk basis, eventually he decided yes lets get rid of him. So to his fathers glory he asked “Paps lets go on a road trip together. His fathers heart melted and they took a trip inside the deserts. After travelling such long hours they came to a spot, he asked his father to get off, the father realised there was tension and asked Oh son are you leaving me. The son replied yes and dont come back. The son returned to his pleased wife restoring his image of manliness. A couple weeks later the the father returned and the wife threw a rage. “what kind of man are you, cant you finish a simple task properly. Get rid of him. So the man tied up his father this time and went back to the desert. Only this time he was ready to strike his father to finish the job, his father pleaded one request that if he intends to kill him then to go slightly deeper to a remote location. They went there… and the son asked why here? The father replied well this is where I killed my father…
I would say usually a decent state school would not mess up a kids life so long as the home state is good. But it would result expectations/ideals in life which may not be to their benefit. To save one from this identity crisis block them from it, and whatever little they may learn in the Islamic School might actually work to their benefit in the Akhirah which is what we want for our children right.. A sucessful akhirah?
Wasssalaam
#4 by Abdullah on March 16, 2009 - 2:48 pm
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You are both right that potentially the quality of education may be less, Allahu Alem on that.
However, Islamic schools do often release grade reports which show they are quite competitive with the public schools. Not only that but they also learn Arabic from a very young age. My son Adam already knows how to count 1 to 10 in arabic and he is only 4 years old.
We can always supplement the secular knowledge with evening lessons from mum and dad, or even private tutoring at Kumon for specific subjects like Math or Science.
Abdullah
#5 by Umm Aadam on March 16, 2009 - 3:49 pm
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Assalam alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatu.
I would like to add that we should ponder on why we are living in a non muslim country in the first place. Are we here for worldly things only? My understanding is that muslims can only live in kufar countries for specific reasons one of them being to spread the message of Islam.
Quran: “Who is better in speech than one who calls (people) to Allah, works rightiousness, and says “I am from the Muslims”
Do any of us even encourage our children to study the Quran and Sunnah; become a sheikh or Scholar of Islam?? Or do we all want our children to become Doctors and Lawyers and have LOTS of money to endulge in this life to the extent that we forget there is an after life until death approaches us or some clamity hits us?
If we cannot afford to put our children in Islamic Schools or we don’t approve of the Islamic School system then there is always the option of Homeschooling. There is no excuse really. We muslims have alot to take advantage of here in Toronto area. There are many different Muslim Homeschooling Groups to join for support, events, field trips, etc. Tons!! We should be taking advantage of these opportunities and not to forget to turn to Allah as well to keep us and our children on the right path and help us in finding solutions to our problems. There are always alternatives..always!
May Allah protect us and our offspring and help us to educate our children in the best way, ameen.
JazakAllahu Khaira for this article.
#6 by Umm Aadam on March 16, 2009 - 3:52 pm
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And if we are unable to educate our children by homeschooling then there is the option of hiring someone. Maybe you can do part time at home and hire someone to teach your children specific subjects as well. InshaAllah:)
#7 by Omar on March 16, 2009 - 3:55 pm
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Assalamo Alaykom
This article definitely raised concerns I haven’t thought about before, being a single guy. And definitely these are things to consider, I remember public school and the negative influence it had upon me. However, I thought I’d throw out there the flipside of the coin.
Sooner or later our kids will go out there and be exposed to unIslamic behaviour, ideas, and world views. If we stop these outside influences when they are young, they will be shocked when they are exposed to them in their teens, whether we like it or not. I have heard and seen many who were raised even in Muslim countries, or in very religious strict homes, only to grow up and rebel.
So it may be better to expose them to it now so they develop a certain immunity, and know the culture here. Public school also taught me much that was useful, and “street smarts”.
And the issue of quality of education is by far the most important. I can see parent sending their kids to Islamic schools till middle school, but for high school they put them in the public system for a better chance at the top universities.
salam
#8 by Majid Mirza on March 16, 2009 - 4:01 pm
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Assalamoalaykum:
MashAllah – great article! As far as solving the lack of professionalism issue goes, why don’t parents volunteer some of their time to improve the conditions in various departments? The presence of parents around the school will also increase the accountability for teachers and administration.
A single drop is worth little, but if everyone joins hands and contributes, the glass can be made full very quickly insha’Allah.
Allahuta’ala Alam.
#9 by Abdullah on March 16, 2009 - 4:33 pm
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Omar, I disagree. I think just growing up in this harmful environment they will see and feel the effects. Go into a convenience store, see pornography magazines. Go downtown, you are blasted more and more with huge haram signs. Go to the mall, and not to mention even at islamic school, you will see kids smoking.
So I think just being in this environment is enough. You can teach them street smarts without putting them directly into the fitnah.
Keep in mind if you throw them in the fitna, they might fail the test.
We do not ask Allah to test us, infact we ask Allah to save us from the tests that destroyed the people before us
#10 by Abdulfatah on March 16, 2009 - 5:58 pm
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You hit the nail on the head mashallah. This is a problem facing a lot of Muslims in the western world subhanalah. We must try to change things and chip in as much as possible.
Barakah Allahu feek ya akhi.
#11 by Dawud Israel on March 16, 2009 - 6:26 pm
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I am against Islamic schools as I see them now, unless they are reformed and lead by true and pious individuals. I would for example, support at the drop of a dime the Islamic school in the UK that was sponsored by Yusuf Islam, because I know Sh. Babikir who runs it has an amazing reputation, his piety being known even here in Canada.
What I have seen go wrong in Islamic schools:
-it means they absorb and pick up the problems of the muslim community and especially the politics of their parents and their bad habits–they become mouthpieces for their parents vendettas
-they want to rebel and take islam for granted, the kid may lead taraweeh ma sha Allah as a hafiz, but after taraweeh he is still going to smoke a blunt (weed)
-there is less and less emphasis in Islamic schools on akhlaaq and more on visibly islamic things like hijab and Quran or Arabic. We need to produce people of moral uprightness, and that is my main concern.
-the resources in a community Islamic school are limited, you might not even have an imam or shaykh and yet an islamic school is needed?
You can’t hide your kids forever, you have to teach them how to deal with situations and the reality of the world. They can’t be sheltered because they will be hopeless and fall prey to fahsha when their parents aren’t around. Islamic schools should connect with the local community- soup kitchens, MSAs, churches even that offer programs irrelated to religion (pro-Gaza stuff), feed the streets, food banks- make them a part of the community and then non-Muslims will support Islamic schools, willingly!
#12 by Abdullah on March 16, 2009 - 6:39 pm
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I’ll add one more comment. Islamic school is a must at the ages where they are unable to distinguish right from wrong.
#13 by Dawud Israel on March 16, 2009 - 7:28 pm
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The other thing I feel we could profit from is having set and real curriculum that helps Islam grow and foster. For example, like the darul ulooms in india, they revise them and had pious individuals devise those curriculums- we need a similar thing in the West.
#14 by Abu Abdullah on March 16, 2009 - 7:59 pm
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AsSalamAlykum
In my opinion, children should be put to islamic school in lower grades but in higher grades when their character is build up and you trust them, they should be sent to public school to be “Exposed” to the bad so that they are better prepared for the real world and know whats out there…
this is only if you fully trust your children
a blog post on islamic school vs home schooling would be interested
#15 by Hisham A. on March 17, 2009 - 2:41 am
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Excuse me for writing the shortest comment here: Good article. Keep writing
.
P.S. You have a bug, try submitting a comment with no email.
#16 by Sunie on March 17, 2009 - 4:58 pm
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Assalamo’allaekum,
AlhumduliAllah. Great points.
However, having met a few home schooled kids (muslim and non.muslim) I am very much impressed by the idea as these kids seem to be well balanced and often ahead of others their own age.
JazakAllahukhair,
Sunie
#17 by Amer on March 17, 2009 - 6:17 pm
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The way I see it is that it is a huge burden on the community financial resources to commit to a full educational system. Countries pay billions to have their education systems up and running and if we expect to have a sustainable Islamic education in the west one would have to suck millions of dollars from the community to operate such schools.
Additionally, as it stands right now, Islamic schools are marketed for the elitists in the community who can afford to pay that $4,000 or more!
It is not a sustainable model unless it is supported by the government through tax cuts or event grants for the schools.
A better model one would claim is to send kids to public schools and focus on Islamic weekend schooling. This will ensure that they get the best of both worlds. For this o work, a carefully planned curriculum for the Weekend Islamic School is needed to deal with issues as they rise in the public school
#18 by Abdullah on March 18, 2009 - 2:07 am
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Amer, I disagree. Even though you say its only the ‘elitist’ who can afford to pay $4000 for school, I find a lot of people don’t want to put their kids in Islamic school simply for the very reason that they would rather buy a house and thus they cannot afford Islamic school!
Another thing is, we consider university a ‘must’, so we fork out the cash for that no problem, but for the younger years, I guess we don’t consider it a must since there is the ‘public school’ option?
#19 by Abu Abdullah on March 18, 2009 - 10:34 pm
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>>>And if we are unable to educate our children by homeschooling then there is the option of hiring someone. Maybe you can do part time at home and hire someone to teach your children specific subjects as well. InshaAllah:)<<<<<
if anyone is interested, please check us out http://www.xlteachers.com/ Better to get muslim tutors than others..you wont be disappointed inshallah
Please inform others about it..
#20 by askmuslims.com volunteer on March 19, 2009 - 1:22 am
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As Salaamu Alaikum wa rahmetullahi wa barakato,
Alhumdulillah very good article but I was expecting it to give us some kind of suggestions. Like which Islamic schools are best in USA and Canada, how to plan for future of the kids etc.
I know that $4000 sounds expensive but we have to think that its an investment for our future generation.
#21 by Amer on March 20, 2009 - 12:36 am
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Assalamo Alekom,
I think it is matter of priorities. Parents would rather provide a shelter for their kids physical needs and save them from the pressure and torture of continuous moves. Many parents wish they can do both, but see providing shelter as more important.
I think Elitist is not necessary the right word since the majority of the Muslim community comes from very low income families.
Additionally, many Muslim families tend to be large in numbers. It is not that $4000 but rather $4000xnumber of children! Let’s say you have 3 kids (which is average), this adds up to over $10,000 in schooling fees (accounting for the discount schools gives for multiple kids). For many people that’s quarter or even half their annual income!
You will be surprised how many kids cannot afford to go to University. Those who can come from mature families who have been living here for a while and have been saving years after years. Another group would be taking OSAP as their way out.
I agree with the virtues of Islamic Schools. Where I disagree is in equating public schools to toilets from morality perspective! If parents spend enough time with their kids after school, enroll them in weekend Islamic Schools, register them at Halaqa’s and youth groups at the local mosques, they can raise their kids in an environment of understanding rather than that of isolation.
#22 by Abdullah on March 23, 2009 - 1:40 pm
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You are right. Many of us cannot afford it. May Allah grant us from his abundant rizq a rizqun tayyibah and give us the ability to be the deciders not the followers.
#23 by mg on March 24, 2009 - 4:20 pm
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good article mashAllah. And I agree, Islamic School up till the age of 13 is very important for most kids; if not anything else, they will at least be praying their fard prayers on time, and have a habit of doing so afterwords inshAllah.
But I do agree with some others in that some kids coming from Islamic schools can and do end up ‘corrupt’ when they leave, and at the end of the day hidaayah is given only by Allah and we can only try our best…
#24 by fk on March 26, 2009 - 1:32 am
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I agree totally with your thoughts in the article. Upright upbringing of the young generation is a serious responsibility of the community.
That said, I have known a haafiz who drank. And I know there are many muslims in muslim countries who are islamically & morally corrupt. Which points out that establishing an islamic-school alone must not make us take false comfort in thinking that we’ve met the challenge.
May Allah keep us & our children in His refuge from the evils in our society. And Bless you for raising the awareness. ameen.
#25 by Maverick on April 10, 2009 - 7:25 am
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salams to all
I tried but I really couldn’t see anyone here placing importance on the most critical aspect of a child’s upbringing – his / her parents.
My parents have raised six kids alhamdulillah. Three girls and three boys, over a period of 14 years. The eldest of us is nearly 30, the youngest nearly 16. We all went to public school. And yet we turned out alright. My sisters all wear hijab and proper libaas. We are polite and courteous in public and private. We take care in regards to halal and haraam in all matters – food, finances, etc. We’ve attended Muslim camps, halaqaat, conferences, conventions, youth groups, etc. We’ve helped in giving dawah in public – from in school to out on the street. If someone asks critical questions about Islam, all of us kids can stand our ground and answer politely, informatively, and persuasively. We formed regular salah in school. We are active in the community. We’ve helped build masaajid. We’ve been active at various levels in ISNA, ICNA, CAIR, YM, Al-Maghrib, al-Kauthar [even before it came to Canada] and so on.
Four out of us six are leaders, whether amongst Muslims or non-Muslims. None of us smoked anything, ever. We never did drugs. We never had BFs or GFs. We all kept our virginity until we married. We never had even a drop of alcohol. We never went clubbing or partying with the “wrong” crowd. No criminal records.
Lest anyone think so, be advised that I am not bragging. I’m simply stating the above to provide comparison and contrast.
And yet I reiterate, we went to public school all our lives. Minor exceptions include one or two years spent in Islamic school – of which we have good memories nonetheless. Yeah, we did Sunday School too.
The key ingredient was the fact that our parents raised us well, alhamdulillah. We were taught the importance of salah from an early age. My dad taught us the value of reading the Qur’an everyday after Fajr, and not only reading and memorizing as much as we could, but also understanding it. I grew up reading the tafaaseer of Maududi [in both english and its original urdu], Yusuf Ali, and others. In our house, Islam came first, culture was a distant second. My culture is not the desi culture of my parents’ backgrounds, but it is North American culture. Jeans, t-shirts, hoodies, pizza, burgers, pasta, fast food, Coke, Nintendo and Xbox, etc. But it is within the parameters of what Islam has allowed.
And on the flip side, I know, and have known, many kids who went to Islamic school and yet they crashed and burned early on in life.
It makes no sense to me to live in ABC environment and yet choose to stick your head in the ground by sending your kids to XYZ school. After all, your kids are still going to be exposed to that same public culture via the media [TV, internet, print, etc] or simply by going outside.
There is absolutely NO substitute for strong, ethical parenting. The Islamic school cannot instill the critical ethics and values that form the base foundation for a decent Muslim; this must be done by the parents, and it must be done at the proper age: the age when kids are too young to go to school. And if they do it properly, then their kids will – bi’idhnellah – withstand the strong winds of peer and societal pressure that are present throughout public school.
Other points in favor of public school:
- As Omar mentioned, its like a vaccine shot. Kids should be exposed to the society that they will be living in anyways, so that they are familiar with it, familiar with the rhythm of life in the West. That’s how they’ll be able to understand the actual difference between Islamic values and non-Islamic.
- Cognitive skills. Don’t kid yourself – even with standards-based educational curricula in Islamic schools, the kids stand a much better chance of developing more robust cognitive skills in public schools than they do in Islamic schools, simply because of the diversity of views.
- Developing dawah skills and thicker skin. As Muslims, one of our over-arching obligations is to call mankind to God, to carry on the message of Islam. Muslim kids are not going to learn dawah skills while sitting in an Islamic-school classroom. My sisters had to sometimes bear the unpleasant incidents where other girls tried to pull their hijabs off. I’ve had to bear derogatory questions and remarks about Islam by those who were ignorant. It helped us all understand their ignorance, and formulate the right answers from an early age. Its an extremely valuable experience when, as a teenage Muslim kid, you find yourself in a debate with peers from other religions. You learn to sell Tawheed in the best and most attractive manner, because you listen to, and then learn to break down, the sophistry and the arguments of shirk and kufr.
- Resources. in our society, the formative years of a child are shaped by the education and schooling he or she receives, and the quality of that education depends in substantial part on the amount and quality of resources at hand. Islamic schools just don’t cut it (yet).
I have great respect for Shk. Yusuf Estes. But I really think he wasn’t being 100% serious when he said you can’t wash the crap off of a kid who has been put through public school.
#26 by Abdullah on April 25, 2009 - 3:29 am
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Assalam alaikum wa rahmatullah
I myself became Muslim (i.e. accepted Islam) after having a good influence through Muslim friends in public school.
That being said, your points are valid, however while kids are at a young age I don’t agree. After puberty, okay, there is some room for maneouvering (some room for debate, lets say), but while they are still in the formative years, I think it’s a mistake to put them in public school.
Yes, your family might be the (good) exception, or the family may have been strong enough, or maybe you were just lucky…….. I think more cases are not like yours than like yours
#27 by Maverick on April 25, 2009 - 3:45 am
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salamualaikum warahmatullah
Abdullah, I kindly disagree.
I think people make excuses for parents by blaming the environment instead. It feels patronizing for someone to tell me that I was lucky, or that our family was an exception.
Neither is the case.
My parents worked very hard to make sure we had a good upbringing. And what they did was not extraordinary, exceptional, or superhuman. All parents are capable of doing what they did, and like I said, there is no substitute for strong parenting skills. That is what forms a strong family, and a strong family is the basic unit of any decent society.
The challenges that life throws at us, the challenges that this environment throws at us, the world, the media, all of these can be met with a strong, coherent response.
And speaking of challenges, I’d appreciate it if someone could really identify at least three or four strong value points of / for Islamic schools. What is it that they offer, that can’t be gained via the usual combination of public school + strong Muslim home?